Life before baby

Ever since I was a little girl I loved babies. When I got older and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I would say I wanted to be a mom. It was my life long dream to get married and have lots of babies and love them with every ounce of my being. When I got into my twenties I still wanted to have children, but I was definitely not ready. As the years went by I wanted to have them much more into the future, not to mention that I wasn't married. Dec 17th of 2007 was an eye opener. I was at work and I kept thinking "maybe I'm pregnant." Even when you think you might be pregnant, you still think "no way." So, I went to the store, got the pee stick and proceeded home. Kristen was home that afternoon watching T.V. I casually went into the bathroom and peed on the stick. It immediately showed "the line." Sheer panic came over me. I yelled for Kristen and showed her and she said " you probably just have cyst or something" ha ha. I convinced myself of that for about an hour before I took 4 more tests. I finally came to terms with the fact I was indeed pregnant. I couldn't believe it. What would I tell my family? Were they going to be mad? What is James going to do? A million thoughts running through my head all day. I went over to James's house later that evening to tell him the news. Before I even spilled the beans he looked at me and said " You are beautiful and I love you and whatever you have to tell me will be OK." I think he kind of knew already. Hearing the actual words "I'm pregnant" still shocked him a little I think. I remember him taking a couple of very deep breaths. We waited to tell everyone until I went to the doctor. That first ultrasound was amazing. I couldn't believe that we were really having a baby. Even though the circumstances weren't exactly right I was really excited about the little miracle that was growing inside me. When I was about 6 months pregnant I thought about making a baby blog. I was going to keep updated progress on my pregnancy. However I thought started at 6 months was a little late. Now that I have a blog I'll share the shortened version. I think I must start with life before wonderful baby Thomas. Before baby things were different. I started my first real job as an administrative assistant at Covelli Enterprises. I had a great house with my best friend Kristen and I was dating a great guy for the last couple of months. Kristen and I lived in our house rent free and all the money we made was disposable income. We went to Ohio State and Browns games every couple of weekends. We had awesome seats. We drank beer and stayed in hotels for the weekend. I went out with my friends on a more than regular basis. I went shopping all the time. James and I went out a lot and we did whatever we wanted to do whenever we wanted to do it. I worried only about me and nothing else. I smoked, I drank and I did what I wanted.

The minute I found out that we were having a baby my world changed. I quit smoking, I quit drinking, I quit going out. My nights consisted of a good book or a movie. It was a really difficult transition. People always said that a having a baby would change everything but you don't really know what that means until you actually live it. Don't get me wrong, I was so excited about having a child but at the same time I was grieving the loss of my old life. I was starting a whole new life.

The picture above is from my first ultrasound. I was 5 weeks and 5 days pregnant. The little circle in the center is the yolk sack. I can't believe this is what are amazing little boy started as! At this stage I was nauseous all the time and I was exhausted. I slept most of the time that I was home.

This was another ultrasound at 7 weeks 5 days. My due date was determined August 16th, 2008. James came to this doctor's appointment with me. It was a party in the room. This was an internal sonogram so I was nakey nake from the waist down. There was my doctor, a nurse, a student, James and me all in the room. The only thing missing was the cake and ice cream!

This was the big day we were waiting for! We found out the sex of the baby on March 7th, 2008. We almost didn't make it to the ultrasound because there was a terrible blizzard happening outside. Everything was closed down and the roads were awful! I was determined to find out that day what we were having. I had waited to long already. We were looking at the screen when the lady said "it's a boy!" James jumped up and yelled "YES!" We were both hoping for a boy so we were both pretty pumped. I started shopping right away

20 weeks

23 Weeks

26 weeks

28 weeks

29 weeks

30 weeks

32 Weeks

34 weeks

36 Weeks

At my 36 week appointment my doctor told me that I was 2cm dilated and my cervix was paper thin. He also said that he didn't expect me to last another week or two! It was at this point that I started getting really nervous. I had no idea how things would work out and the thought of pushing a baby out of you know where really had me worried.